girls.

If you're just like me, then you've always been able to find something wrong with the latest girl that you're infatuated in. Girls just seem to come and go, like a see-saw. One gets on, rides for a while, hops off, then another hops on. Whoa/ crazy sexual innuendo, but really not intended.

See, this kid knows what I'm talking about. He's like "Bitch get off." She's like "Just kidding right?"

Every time I'm with a girl, it's always fun as shit for a month or two. And then I start to get bored, and try to find anything negative about her so I have a reason ready in case I want to bail. Pretty soon, I just want out of the relationship and just leave. Almost every girl I've broken up with, I've never talked to after the dumpage(couldn't think of a better word). It's weird, but it's necessary. I have to put up a fake front to make the ex think I'm better off now and I have some weird resentment towards her.

Prime example right here.

So she's almost always confused and hurt, and doesn't want to talk to me ever again, or she's angry and bitter, and still doesn't want to talk to me ever again. So either way, it's a win-win situation.

Both of these pictures are acceptable for the condition the girl should be left in after the dumpage. If your ex does not always look like this for at least a week, you have failed miserably.

I hope I'm not the only one like this. But, I know that every guy gets bored sooner or later; whether it be two weeks later or two years later. It's all the same in the end. So how do you find someone you're really going to be with forever? Just like Pikachu and Ash? How do you form an unbreakable bond with someone without having to go through a wild ass Pokemon adventure since you were 10? (Pokemone trivia// get at me bitch.)


Hope you enjoyed all the pictures of little kids. I find that pictures of little kids elicit more feeling than pictures of adults. It's true, just think about it sukka fries. In case you haven't seen these videos, these are by far the funniest Jon & Kate dating parody videos.


Way off on a tangent, LOOK! Jon Gosselin's hip now. I don't mean to bag on him or anything, since I'm not even going to act like I know what's happening. All I know is, his kids are ridiculously cute. But yeah, Jon's cool now. He's smoking and it looks like his hair's coming back! In case you haven't seen these videos, these are by far the funniest Jon & Kate dating parody videos.

blogtest.

This is really what's up.

I'm having a blogtest with my friend. And for those who are a wee bit slow, a blogtest is the ultimate blog contest. You win by getting as many RANDOM subscribers as you can. I have no set plan on how to win this, but just try not to be offended by my posts. I decided that most of my posts are going to be about ideas I've had while my altitude was way above sea level. All I've got to do is remember them.. Easier said than done.

Amusing little anecdote.

I woke up at 1:20 PM because I had to poop. I was freeballing, so there was no dilemna pulling my boxers down and whatnot. Besides freeballing is the ish. Anyhoo, I'm burnt out and feeling the effects of the Roor from last night. I finally finish pooping my morning meatball bombs, per usual, when I notice that my pee-pee got a little splashback on it from the doo-doo bombs. So I proceed to wipe my dick dry, but I forgot to wipe my butt. I'm halfway back on my bed when I realized that I forgot to wipe my butt-hole. (I feel like I used so many hyphens in this..) So I gingerly tip-toed back to the bathroom, no need to explain why. Besides, I have carpet, not hardwood floor; way harder to clean. Turns out I had no doo-doo residue on my bung-hole. Either my doo-doo is mad clean, or Jesus loves me. Evidently, both are true.

Just a sample of what's to come, my friends. I can tell the fredship is growing.

fred·ship

Pronounciation: \ˈfre(d)-ˌship\

Function: noun

Date: 21 century

1: the state of being friends with fred park